* He's got a 360 under one of his old names. He uses a picture of the guitarist from 'System of a Down' to pass off as his own. & he's had hundreds of different screen names.
edit / 01 March 2006: when I went to clear my archive, it showed this screen name - ric_of_the_pagan_saints - which led me to his new 360 profile, with all new girls but the same old lies.
edit / much later: in another twist, the live-in girlfriend he had, discovered after he left, via a received letter, that Ric had a wife and a child somewhere, and she was accused of being a homewrecker. This young girl had lived with Ric for 4 years and had no idea that he had ever been married. It just goes to show how much of a liar this man is / was. Very scary internet story.
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fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:20:46 PM): ok i know u hate me but I have to say I cant get u outta my mind and am so damn sorry but hey I dont blame u if u dont wanna talk to me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:21:33 PM): i don't hate anyone.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:21:41 PM): yeah u do
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:21:44 PM): u hate me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:21:59 PM): why would i hate you?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:22:11 PM): cause I said Id not hurt u and I did
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:22:20 PM): and yes it kills me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:23:16 PM): well, it sucks, what you did. but i don't hate you.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:23:25 PM): u know who I am
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:23:27 PM): ?
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:23:42 PM): i can guess with the 007 bit, yeah.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:23:55 PM): ok
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:24:09 PM): well amber I still miss u...u was great to me
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:24:21 PM): and u still look pretty as ever
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:25:01 PM): thank you. & yeah, I tried to be good, considering I was out of a bad relationship - thought I was getting into a good one & then that whole thing happened. It hurt, yeah.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:25:57 PM): yeah it hurt me too amber and u know what even though I fucked up I still think of u alot
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:27:07 PM): i've thought of you too. Mostly though, have tried to figure out why you did that. I thought I was your babydoll & that you loved me ... & i guess i wasn't & you didn't.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:27:23 PM): no dont think that
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:27:42 PM): u was and will always be even though Im scum to u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:28:24 PM): i don't think you're scum.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:29:08 PM): i thought we had something. it meant something to me when you said you cared about me / loved me / wanted me. & then all that shit happened. & you never explained why.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:29:30 PM): u know what though I still read ur live journal
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:29:53 PM): i keep most entries under a friends only lock - but yeah?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:30:01 PM): yeah
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:30:27 PM): I like ur pics and the ones of u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:30:33 PM): thank you...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:30:45 PM): amber i hate myself really
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:30:55 PM): u was so good for me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:31:27 PM): ....what took you so long to IM me, Ric?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:31:35 PM): cause i was scared
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:31:44 PM): I hated me and will always
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:32:06 PM): I think it hurt me most of all that you were trying to make up with all the other girls, but you didn't think I was worth saying one word to...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:32:40 PM): no I didnt try to make up with any after u I shut down
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:32:47 PM): I talk to none of em now
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:33:04 PM): ur the only one I have came back to
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:33:08 PM): but you did try to make up with the other girls - to stay with them - you didn't talk to me...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:33:21 PM): well they are gone
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:33:29 PM): ur the only one
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:33:43 PM): Ive came back to
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:33:43 PM): besides your real life girlfriend, right?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:34:05 PM): ok we do still live together but we have no relationship
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:34:12 PM): she does her thing
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:34:31 PM): oh.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:34:58 PM): but amber I just want u to know I miss u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:35:07 PM): even though that means crap to u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:35:33 PM): i missed you too - i missed the Ric I thought I was with. The whole thing left me very confused about everything.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:36:25 PM): Is it true that you told the other girls that I'm a psycho with mental problems? & that I was never your girl? because that always bothered me.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:36:42 PM): omgs amber nooooooo
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:37:00 PM): really? because that hurt a lot - i cried a lot over that.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:37:21 PM): and after all this happened someone stole my identity and started even more shit
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:37:50 PM): I know who did but they deny it
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:38:08 PM): oh man. i wondered what happened. well. what am I supposed to do? I mean, that was a lot of hurt. I actually thought you & I were boyfriend / girlfriend, Ric.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:38:44 PM): I did too amber i just took it all for granted and the one peson I really cared about I hurt
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:39:03 PM): but after that I just faded away for a while
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:39:57 PM): well, i don't know what to say. I really didn't think I'd hear from you again.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:40:53 PM): hun I wanted to talk to u but like I said I just thought u would tell me fuck off but I said today Im talking to u and if u said fuck off then fine
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:41:17 PM): well, i'm not saying fuck off.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:41:44 PM): amber I miss u and Ill never forgive myself what i did
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:42:02 PM): I been thinking of u all the time
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:42:14 PM): really? you really thought of me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:42:20 PM): yes hun
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:42:37 PM): when shes not here I sit here and look at ur pics and cry
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:42:56 PM): Im crying now..lol
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:43:53 PM): wow - really? i didn't know you even thought of me. Ric, when that all went down - when I found out you had other girlfriends, it hurt me in so many ways. it was humiliating. Here I was, trying to trust in love - & it was all made up?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:44:10 PM): no
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:44:23 PM): what i had for u was luv
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:44:32 PM): the others was just company
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:44:43 PM): but i dont do that now
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:44:55 PM): I learned my lesson
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:45:03 PM): really? that was love you had for me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:45:31 PM): yes baby I realized it unfortunatly late
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:45:43 PM): after all that I still missed just u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:45:55 PM): yeah, a lot has happened since that all went down.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:45:57 PM): I dream bout u still
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:46:18 PM): whats happened?
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:46:32 PM): well, for one thing. I stopped being so stupid.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:46:39 PM): k
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:47:15 PM): & I've learned that just because someone says something that feels real - it could just be they're playing a game with me. & that they're full of shit.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:47:29 PM): k
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:48:26 PM): What I felt for you was real Ric. & then it turns out your entire life was a lie. & that you were hurting other women with those lies. & now the good memories I have of us, I remember, but it could never make up for this.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:48:58 PM): thanks for IM'ing me though. Finally. I wondered if you had a second thought about me at all. & now I know you did. So thanks for that.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:49:15 PM): yeah amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:49:35 PM): well if I could ID START OVER AND NOT PLAY WITH U LIKE THAT
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:49:38 PM): damn caps
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:50:26 PM): start over? You mean, just go back to when I thought it was just you & me - back to when we had our plans to have a future together? back to when I thought you loved me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:50:47 PM): yeah reverse time
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:51:13 PM): but i cant so I have to live with it
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:52:16 PM): well, guess what - I actually somehow managed to gather up some sense of self in that mess - & I'm actually glad it happened. & you should try to figure out who you are & what you really want, Ric, because life is fleeting.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:52:41 PM): amber thats what I been doin
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:52:55 PM): & you want me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:53:21 PM): ugh I dont wanna say amber
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:53:37 PM): so you don't want me.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:53:38 PM): just think this..............
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:53:40 PM): okay.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:53:57 PM): I came back to talk to just u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:54:13 PM): alright.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:54:44 PM): and if that tells u anything then u should know how I feel
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:55:30 PM): but theres noway u will ever ever trust me for anything
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:55:43 PM): and i dont blame u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:55:55 PM): amber????
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:58:01 PM): ric, what did you expect me to say?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:58:17 PM): I wasnt done talking amber
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:58:22 PM): okay.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 8:58:34 PM): you had more ?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:58:38 PM): yes
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:58:45 PM): listen...........
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:58:57 PM): I still luv u thats never changed
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:59:03 PM): I think of u alot
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:59:08 PM): I fucked up yes
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:59:29 PM): and I know I took the best thing that ever happened and fucked it up
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:59:45 PM): and I still will never forget u amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 8:59:54 PM): cause u was the best for me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:00:07 PM): ....i remember sharing our dreams, Ric. dreams - the actual dreams we had when sleeping - & that meant so much to me - was any of it real?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:00:18 PM): yes all of it
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:00:21 PM): owwwwww
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:00:25 PM): ouchh
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:00:39 PM): hey can we voice my hands cramping
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:01:21 PM): its hard to type
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:01:38 PM): i have to get the mic. & the least that should happen is your hands cramp - dammit ric, I thought we loved each other.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:02:01 PM): I did
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:02:57 PM): ok amber i know I did wrong but dont bring my parkinsons in this
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:03:13 PM): its hell enough then wish it on me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:04:00 PM): .... i don't wish it on you. I don't think I could handle hearing you right now. We used voice chat all the time - you know? back when I thought I was your only girlfriend...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:04:16 PM): please amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:04:26 PM): I wanna still talk
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:04:33 PM): but my hands shaky
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:05:01 PM): ric, someone else loves me, for real now.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:05:10 PM): oh
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:05:44 PM): i loved you Ric. You're right. You did lose a good thing. But then, you lost a lot of girlfriends at once, right?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:06:20 PM): well amber i know u dont believe me but u was the only one I held close to me
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:06:27 PM): and always will
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:06:40 PM): ....
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:07:18 PM): but u have someone else and I have to just deal with that
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:07:24 PM): will you be telling them this too?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:07:40 PM): amber I dont talk to em anymore
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:07:48 PM): I dont even go into chat
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:07:54 PM): I play games and thats all
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:08:05 PM): but you will now that I've said I'm in love with someone else now?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:08:11 PM): no
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:08:42 PM): I guess in my head I was hoping u would someday come back to me but I know better
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:08:55 PM): dumb me
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:09:15 PM): anyway amber u deserve the best
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:09:20 PM): Thank you.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:09:43 PM): hope u got someone who lives close
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:09:54 PM): what does that mean? why?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:10:01 PM): I been getting sicker anyway
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:10:19 PM): but I deserve that
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:11:12 PM): nobody deserves to be sick. Just like nobody deserves to be lied to so magnificently as you lied to me.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:12:01 PM): the only thing I lied about was that u was the only one....when I said I luved u I meant it and I meant I was coming to be with u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:12:13 PM): I couldnt wait for that day
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:12:36 PM): ....you really loved me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:13:11 PM): but anyway amber u have someone else whos coming to be with u and share ur luv with...and yes amber I loved u more than words could ever say
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:13:23 PM): and I still do
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:13:29 PM): and always will
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:13:55 PM): I yurned to touch u and kiss u and do it all with u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:14:10 PM): even the tongue piercing
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:14:18 PM): even if it did scare me
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:15:07 PM): well, if it had been real, it could have been good. but it wasn't real.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:15:17 PM): it was real
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:15:52 PM): u know what everyday in my head I run the convos we had on the phone and mic in my head
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:16:12 PM): I still remember ur voice
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:16:44 PM): i used to talk with you when you worked at the pub. & there was that time you fell asleep after phone sex. Yeah, I remember too. & then you turned out to have a girlfriend (or girlfriends!) -
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:16:45 PM): so sad.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:04 PM): yes amber I fucked up
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:09 PM): and yes its sad
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:16 PM): but it was always u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:24 PM): u was my luv
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:35 PM): u will always be the best 1
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:17:56 PM): Ill never forget u amber
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:18:36 PM): well, nice of you to finally share your thoughts with me.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:18:40 PM): u was and will always be luved by me
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:19:10 PM): I crave u still but thats all I will ever do is crave
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:19:31 PM): so you didn't tell people in the rooms that I'm psycho? people said i made it up that we were together.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:19:44 PM): no amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:20:01 PM): I never said no such thing
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:20:23 PM): okay.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:20:33 PM): amber I loved u so much I never said a bad thing about u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:20:52 PM): ....promise? really? you loved me that much?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:21:15 PM): yes i swear on my grandmas grave..I loved u that much and more
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:21:41 PM): remember when you told me that you felt you had your grandparents blessing for us?
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:21:50 PM): that they'd be happy for us to be together? that touched me.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:21:55 PM): but it wasn't true.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:21:56 PM): amber I still love u more and more
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:22:09 PM): yes it was and trust me I payed for that
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:22:27 PM): I had bad dreams for my hurting u and my familyu
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:23:03 PM): it hurt a lot.t
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:23:06 PM): and Im in my personal hell for it but I needed to come and tell u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:23:24 PM): and tell u that ur still there in my heart
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:23:34 PM): u always will be
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:23:53 PM): I look at ur pic and dream
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:24:01 PM): what might of been
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:24:41 PM): you look at my pic? well, you know, i used to think i was your girlfriend.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:25:12 PM): so these pics would have been of your girl. but turns out i wasn't your girl. so yeah, dreaming I guess would be all you can do now.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:25:40 PM): listen u was my g/f
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:25:49 PM): the others was just company
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:25:57 PM): u was always my girl
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:26:18 PM): if i was talking to asnyone and u logged in I dropped em and came running to u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:26:55 PM): okay...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:26:58 PM): but like u said
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:27:08 PM): Ill have u in my dreams
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:27:18 PM): that will never change
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:27:21 PM): but what about the live in girlfriend? You told me she was the psycho ex who bothered you at work???
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:27:35 PM): well she kinda was
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:27:43 PM): our feelings are dead
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:28:19 PM): does she know about me?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:28:21 PM): amber I realize that I should of came way back when to canada
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:28:49 PM): and Id been happy
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:29:05 PM): she knew
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:29:28 PM): cause she had someone hack my name
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:29:41 PM): oh...
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:29:43 PM): and then they started more shit
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:29:58 PM): but thats then
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:30:01 PM): yeah.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:30:06 PM): its done and gone
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:30:21 PM): and Im here and wanted to talk to u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:30:44 PM): okay. well. do you feel better now that you've talked to me? or worse?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:30:56 PM): Ill never feel better
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:31:14 PM): u was my life
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:31:26 PM): I woke up everyday to be with u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:31:40 PM): I loved u within deep in my soul
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:31:50 PM): thats why Im here
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:32:24 PM): Ill never be as happy as I was with u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:32:48 PM): I was the happiest when i was with u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:33:22 PM): but I have to fade away again from ur life
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:33:54 PM): and just go back to reading ur journal and looking at ur pics
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:34:13 PM): stalking, lol, in other words, ha!
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:34:30 PM): well no cause I wont be following u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:34:42 PM): but hey Ill not look at ur journal
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:34:44 PM): i was kidding.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:34:50 PM): Ill stay away amber
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:35:15 PM): well, you did stay away. Didn't hear one word from you for months.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:35:30 PM): well amber I was scared
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:35:33 PM): I hurt u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:35:38 PM): and I was scared
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:36:08 PM): ....yes, you hurt me. I'm over it now though.,
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:36:13 PM): I had to come back even if its this 1 time and tell u Iam sorry
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:36:21 PM): You're sorry? for real?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:36:26 PM): and u will always be in my mind
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:36:30 PM): and heart
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:36:45 PM): amber if u could see me my face
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:36:49 PM): u would know
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:37:07 PM): i hurt
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:37:12 PM): i cry
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:37:29 PM): most of all
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:37:36 PM): i still love
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:37:54 PM): do you feel that way for pixie too?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:38:00 PM): never
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:38:03 PM): just u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:38:12 PM): I promise
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:38:29 PM): how about - the other girls?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:38:36 PM): I have dreams bout u and wake and wanna stay asleep
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:38:42 PM): no one else amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:39:42 PM): I dream that u and me are laying by each other or whatever and I dont wanna wake
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:40:47 PM): you used to tell me lots of dreams you said you had about us. i believed them.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:40:57 PM): I had em all amber
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:41:03 PM): they all was real
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:41:53 PM): well. that's nice.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:42:03 PM): I still have em
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:42:12 PM): prob always will
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:43:18 PM): amber I miss u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:43:26 PM): I really do
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:43:28 PM): that's good to hear.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:43:40 PM): ok well ummm
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:44:02 PM): I guess Ill go cause Im just bothering u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:44:30 PM): no, you're not bothering me. I guess this just seems a bit unreal. You know? I didn't hear from you at all for so long. What's a girl to think?
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:44:40 PM): was i your babydoll?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:44:59 PM): u still are amber even though Im nuttin to u
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:46:17 PM): you know, I wondered why you never talked to me when the drama happened. It was all going down & I felt so alone & hurt - & you were supposed to love me - & you never said a word. Until now.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:46:34 PM): I hid
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:46:39 PM): like a coward
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:46:54 PM): I wanted to tell u that I love u still but couldnt
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:46:54 PM): You know, I deserved better.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:47:02 PM): then to be treated like that.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:47:07 PM): i know
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:47:20 PM): i'm worth more than that.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:47:39 PM): amber u opened a world to me I wanted to expeirence
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:47:54 PM): the love the sex all of it
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:48:31 PM): well, you lost all of it when the truth came out.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:48:39 PM): I know
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:49:21 PM): amber I guess I should just let u go and live ur life with ur new guy.....I just wish it was me
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:49:46 PM): Id go through hell for u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:49:58 PM): but I have to accept my loss
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:51:02 PM): you accept defeat easily - as easily as I fell for your lies! I'm so glad we're past that now. You know, after the weeks of hell I went through when this all came out,
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:51:10 PM): I afterwards felt very relieved.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:51:48 PM): Relieved that the lie was over. & that I could now be open to have a real love. So thanks for walking into that chatroom that morning & setting off a chainreaction.
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:51:55 PM): It hurt, but was worth it.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:52:09 PM): amber i have to accept defeat
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:52:17 PM): I cant ever have u back
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:52:36 PM): so I have to just bow and fade away
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:52:58 PM): Fade out then. & good luck trying these lines on the other girls, eh?
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:53:10 PM): I just wish I could of kissed u once
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:53:27 PM): amber Im not interested in anyone now
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:53:38 PM): excepy u but thats gone
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:53:44 PM): except*
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:53:58 PM): okay.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:54:14 PM): amber i love u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:54:20 PM): and that wont change
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:54:26 PM): but anyway
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:54:48 PM): .
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:54:55 PM): if u ever wanna chat Ill be here
goldmourn (2/23/2006 9:55:05 PM): okay.
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:55:16 PM): gods I miss u
fire_god007 (2/23/2006 9:55:38 PM): ok bye Im truly sorry