November 24th, 2008

alice lost in labyrinth

It's more deliberate.

Sometimes you know things have to change, are going to change, but you can only feel it --- like in that song of Sam Cooke's, "Change Is Gonna Come" --- but you don't know it in a purposeful way. Little things foreshadow what's coming, but you may not recognize them. But then something immediate happens and you're in another world, you jump into the unknown, have an instinctive understanding of it --- you're set free. You don't need to ask questions and you already know the score. It seems like when that happens, it happens fast, like magic, but it's really not like that. It isn't like some dull boom goes off and the moment has arrived --- your eyes don't spring open and suddenly you're very quick and sure about something. It's more deliberate. It's more like you've been working in the light of day and then you see one day that it's getting dark early, that it doesn't matter where you are --- it won't do any good. It's a reflective thing. Somebody holds the mirror up, unlocks the door --- something jerks it open and you're shoved in and your head has to go into a different place. Sometimes it takes a certain somebody to make you realize it.

- Bob Dylan, 'Chronicles Volume One'
alice lost in labyrinth

a streetcar

reading bob dylan's 'chronicles', i didn't notice the man sit down across the aisle.

but i must have felt that confident casual way he stretches himself out, so leisurely, so slow, like a smile. he takes his seat across from me when the car is almost empty and this isn't the first time.

i look over to see him there as though he'd been all along, as though this time and the last were a second ago, instead of a few weeks. i set my book down and he picks up our conversation from where we last left off.

"it took you 3 stops to notice me," he reminds me again before he steps out into the street.

it took me 3 more stops to breathe right.