June 21st, 2000

alice lost in labyrinth

poem: cat scratch fever

cat scratch fever

(11:00pm 20 June 2000)
The elderly woman
who has the room
across from mine
is in the hallway
and won't go to bed
she sits in a chair
talking to herself
I heard her say
...something...
something about
grilled cheese sandwiches
I know she can hear me
though she would be
chattering away
she'd quickly grow quiet
when I would press buttons
on my side rails
to adjust the bed
The movements from her
make me visualize her
straining toward my door
to hear the noise of my room
I notice that the
meds are done dripping
It shouldn't be long
before the nurse is back
to remove the needle
from the needle
in my arm
I am in "isolation"
but I have the feeling
Woman in the Hallway
is more confined
than I am
"Confused" they call her
what they mean is delirious
I cannot understand
what she is mumbling
but it doesn't matter as
she answers herself:
"It's entirely possible"
she laughs in response
as though she were Einstein
discovering relativity.
"It's twenty to twelve, are
you sure you're not tired?"
"Yes," I thought to myself
I took the tiny sleeping pill
that I was given and
it crumbled beneath my tongue
...reminded me of something...
This will be a night of many
without my lover
asleep beside me
sometimes I would open
my eyes in the dark
and see him watching me...
On this night of
thunder, lightening
and splashing rain
In this city, this
hospital of my birth
Sleep, it came to me
alone, with eyes closed.

ADP 20/21 June 2000