goldmourn (amberdawnpullin) wrote,

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In part of my dreams Gwen was writing me -

Sunday, May 12, 2002

I got myself out of bed just after 9am but I had been awake for a little while thinking about whether I wanted to get up up or not - my bladder decided for me. Last night I had been laying on the small couch with my chin on the coffee table, writing in my paper journal and watching tv, when I realized I was exhausted and was not going to stay up to watch 'Saturday Night Live' after all. I was in bed by 11:30pm.

Today is a rainy Mother's Day. I hope Mom stops by today because I have something for her...

In part of my dreams Gwen was writing me - I was reading her letter in a book, the words appearing as though she was writing me that very moment. I didn't know what had changed her mind but I was happy to be reading her words again. I had a difficult time in parts of my dream with my legs. This isn't the first time I've had that. Having problems with my legs is a reoccurring theme from time to time in my nightmares. It's usually very difficult for me to be able to walk, to stay standing on my legs. While trying to walk down the street, which so happened to be one in St. Thomas, my hometown, I was talking to Guy as though on a cellphone but it was a headphone set. People were around as this was near one of the high schools, and I looked like I was talking to myself, but I wasn't. And sometime later around there I had the little book open in which Gwen's letter to me was being written. There was a lot of other stuff but I'm forgetting it all. Seeing as how more than one dream occurs during sleep, I've forgotten most all of them. Just remembering one part... the high school... shooting going on... some men with guns... running throughout the school to try and find a place to be safe (because they had people situated near the doors) and seeing people get shot... and a straw fell at my feet indicating they had seen me... I'd nearly been hit by a straw? In another part I was bugging this man about my ideas for a book dealing with music and I was talking so fast and excitedly about my idea as we walked down the street - he was trying his best to get away from me. My ideas were great and I was thinking to myself about how happy I am when I can share my creative ideas... I remember thinking that thought.

"I've got my spine... I've got my orange crush..." - R.E.M.

I'm listening to FM 96. I should probably take my meds and get some breakfast. Yep, I think I'll do that...
Tags: dreams & nightmares

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